Monday, June 23, 2008

window of escape

The window is symbol for the fact that I always found myself looking through the window, wishing I was somewhere else”A few days back I was meticulously googling for a nice tattoo idea. It was a silly, crazy, fun phase which is over now (leaving a deep red scar that looks like a star)
Anyway, while doing that I came across this thought. Angelina Jolie got a tattoo of a blue window, because she always wished to be somewhere else.
Going by that logic, maybe I should get a barn door done coz I feel the same way most of the time.
In my case however I am not looking through the window, I’ve already gone past it to unspoken mysterious lands. Maybe it’s about striking the right balance between day dreaming and practicality. Or maybe it’s about being content in the place you are in. that’s a lot of maybe without a concrete answer.
I’ve tried finding one; a lot of free time gives you the privilege to do that. Finding answers to questions that are hypothetical and that demand a lot of philosophical thought to it.
Why does one always feel like running away?
1. Because it’s not running away it’s the inner voice urging you on to achieve your goals. This idea sounds good coming from Robin Sharma or Deepak chopra, but is not true in most cases.
2. you’ve your inner battle on, when you know you ought to be at a different location but the deep values ingrained by the society makes you stick to the sticky marshland you are at. And then when you finally realize that you have to break free, you are like the elephant that is used to the chain of childhood, and can’t unshackle the thin rope that ties it down.
3. Finally, it’s just you. The sooner you accept it the better. You have just two choices: either achieve all that you desire and stay put. Or the race continues.
Angelina got the tattoo covered, coz she now feels she likes the place she is at. Obviously she married Brad Pitt. (Not that I am a fan.)
I have a long list to cover before I get the barn door replaced by rock solid wall…stuff dreams are made of.
But then, whether it’s writing crappy blogs or solving FEA matrices, it’s all loneliness we all are stuck with. And the only way to deal with it is to look through the window/barn door/looking glass and find a whole new world like Alice with amazing characters. You get to be the queen at last.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

DEATH OF A STAR

This ones an obituary to one of the greatest stars. To clarify it further, I'd first give an insight to the event which triggered this whole episode and made me take out my anger this way.(this way= publicly in form of a blog).
now, i don't lead a awesome life, job sucks out a lot of awesomeness and I'm left with no other option then to pump a little some ness by catching a movie as soon as it releases. so Friday evenings are spent in the theatre.. And i have quite a experience and patience of enduring half baked to fully burnt flicks today's scenario offers. ( well this actually reminds me of the time i once did advance booking for RGV ki aag..proves that I'm not a very intellectual person but suits me right)
last Friday i went to see one such movie. And till now I'm wondering.. why??? how can it be???
why- as in why did priyadarshan make mere baap...(when he once made herapheri..)
how can it be- as in how can a certain Mr. om puri - to list his credentials , a national award winner(ardhsatya), an OBE, and a above 50 reputed actor portray such a nonsensical, stupid, cheap, and all other words i know but cant write here.. role.
The movie made me mourn the death of an actor in hands of maybe unemployment or poverty. which one I'm unable to guess because both are kinda the same thing.
I'm a total movie freak and it really hurt to see one of my favourite actors fall so deep( for want of better words) into the earth!! i think they should make a rule against it.
that reminds me of the time another great actor farookh shaikh was mocked at for acting in sub standard serials, he did make a retreat and the damage was partly controlled.
Another memory is of naveen nischol who refused to play substandard characters ( to the best of my knowledge) and guess he maintains his dignity. but i even read he was going through financial crisis in absence of good roles.
So that takes my train of thoughts to another track... the unanswered question.
in the war of money Vs talent. why does talent take a backseat?
well in my field of work it happens too.. only that its not displayed so openly on 70 mm..and most of the people caught up in this trap are in fake denial- but it exists.
How i wish it wasn't the way it is. how i wish everyone was free to choose the path they desired. Free enough to call a spade a spade... and finally not be subjected to pressure and live with a certain basic character.