Things which are not meant to last

"There are some things that are nothing more than what they are, they're not meant to last।
They just take their place in your heart and make you a little smarter the next time."
This was the quote i heard from Alex and Emma (A Luke Wilson, Kate Hudson starer.. which is extremely forgettable and cute, if it can be both the same time.) and it again set my vella brain thinking ...Thinking about the truth in the sentence.And then i thought that there are so many things which we consider important in our lives when they really aren't.
So i can either write another list to give an sequential order to such things which i may laugh upon few years down the line or am laughing upon now..Or else i can just scrap the whole process because its another thing thats not meant to last. But i do enjoy the list writing process.
So where does this start.."Things which are not meant to last"
1. JOB- thats great. the first thing that comes to my mind when i start this is my job.. but think of it. its the most important thing in my life rgt now(except for some other things..which will constitute the next list..thats for another day btw). lets face it.. job- not meant to last but is helping me pay my internet+phone+shopping+impulsive shopping+vacations bills and also making me smarter(is it??? another distraction from the main topic of discussion.."IS IT MAKING ME SMARTER?"- well, if u call sitting in front of computer with ear plugs playing latest TASHAN songs, trying to mesh a component u have no idea of, using a software which is even more alien smart..then sure..).So, point is my job not going to last.. its just a monthly income which is welcome for sure.

2. MY CURRENT FRUSTRATION ON POINT 1 ABOVE.

Now I'm on crossroads..i can either try making the list funny or get on a more serious note... lets take the path less traveled..

3. FRIENDS: one thing I've learn t coming in the corporate world is that friends dont exist here, and any1 who thinks they do, needs a reality check. or else needs to redefine the way he defines the word friends. i had great friends in college. after that i just made some few acquaintances. I don't know what does it to ppl...is it money or status(so-called if i may add) or just the wish to make a mark or show off. But majority of ppl u see in this world are hidden..dont actually see them.. wat u can see is a frightened, burdened soul hidden behind a beautiful mask.( I agree that some1 may have the same perspective for me... but i do belong to this world)

4.IMPRESSIONS: this is related to point 3 above..another thing I've noticed is that impressions dont last. I can quite prove the old saying"FIRST IMPRESSION IS THE LAST IMPRESSION" wrong, because it isn't. I've seen it shattering all around me.The moment you see some1 and you make a mental sketch of the person he/she is..which he isn't(remember we are still talking about the ppl we cant see, the frightened, burdened souls). but it sure does waste a lot of time, the whole process of realizing that he/she isn't the one you think and theres a lot of depth to that person( or in some cases shallowness). My point is the one which every induction pro gramme in every MNC say but none follows, "the BE YOURSELF" theory. why is it so necessary to make false impressions. what are we afraid of really? my research says its the fear of not fitting in.. but guess a lion doesn't need to fit in a herd of sheep.(enough gyan..)

Coming to the second line of the quote.. "they just take a place in your heart...."

5.Thinking of the things that occupy the bytes maybe gigabytes in the heart( such a wastage..these things need to be SHIFT+DELETE..some1 once said about having a pure heart).. seriously,why do some things tug the heart so strongly once and then few years later its just a dull hum mm..when u think of it..example can be a high school crush which was all so important then and now maybe you are high on the ladder of success and that one person is where..no idea( this thought inspired from "13 going on 30" jennifer's high school crush ends up being a taxi driver.)

I think thats the most i can think of things that don't last.. bottom line, whenever u face a situation when u think the world is falling apart..just fast forward your life and think will it matter then? better said then done but worth a try...

poem time..

what follows is something i wrote way back..maybe in my teens..i dont remember exactly... but i believe its a good piece of work.. and also right now reflects my journey ... so here it goes..

एक पेड़ है मेरे आँगन में, जिस से बातें करता हूँ,

साथ है मेरे बचपन से, उससे अक्सर मिलता हूँ,

एक दिन यूं ही मैंने उस से नाम उसका पूछ लिया,

हस कर उसने धीरे से मेरा ही नाम दोहरा दिया...

उस दिन से निस्बत और भी गहरे हो गए..

इंतज़ार में तेरे अक्सर हम साथ बैठे रो गए.

हमारा रिशता है हमेशा हर वक्त..

कहता है मुझसे, मैं तेरा हूँ वसुहत..

मेरी तरह वह भी सजदे किसी के करता है ..

चाँद के पास कहीं तारा उसका रहता है ..

शायद मेरी खातिर ही जिया जाता था,

अपनी अनुशा का दीदार किया जाता था,

आज जो टुटा हुआ देखा मुझे,

आखिर बोल ही पड़ा," चल हमनाम.. खुद्खुशी कर लें

आंगन में मेरे ही टूट के बिखरा,

सुबुक पलाश को सबने ही कुचला

जाते जाते कह गया मुझसे, "तू मुसाफिर है , मुसाफिर ही रहना,

रात को चाँद के पास देखना, मेरा सफर खत्म हुआ.. मेरा तारा टूट गया.."

my list

I recently finished reading P.S. i love you. well it was more like reading a M&B only the end wasnt all mushy the way MB's end. But guess MB's are written by all LA county females with rich husbands and totally empty upper floors who see life as just a happy ending seceretary meet rich boss stories.( who am i kidding? i actually did contribute to their sales for ages). But, PS was diffrent. maybe coz the writer was irish and not american. who knows?

But thats not the whole point. The point is that PS made me go back to being dreamy. Dreamy bout evrything perfect and lovely in life. It made me rethink about the way i want my life to be. More importantly, it made me write the LIST.

I'd accept that i did go thr the endless lists of "velle" ppl like me on net. but then i also did come up with my own (things i wanna do before i turn 30)which goes like this:

1. learn spoken french. i actually can understand a lot (if Sonia knows hindi, am an expert in French) why French? dont ask me.. actually guess its quite obvious.

2. bungee jump once ( and the following list will only come true if my rope doesnt snap, paranoid??? nah..)

3. learn professional Bharatnatyam.

4. visit the Ice Hotel..( i need cash!!!)

5. write a book and get published.( maybe win a man-booker prize, now this is getting serious)

6. Have Dinner on Eiffel tower.( This reminds me of govinda song.. "main jo raah mein apni murti lagvaun..meri marzee..)

7.escape marriage... yeah rgt.. ( this point is why am writing all this crap here not in my personal diary...i love my parents and besides i wud hate it if any of them suffers a stroke.. so point 7 definately not for my mom-dad)

8. Find a Spanish bf..(wild.. wilder... seriously.. i think they r sexy..and if i cant speak my mind.. then it wont be my blog.. rgt??)

9. hmm... now am thinking.. yeah own a business empire where i rule things.. trust me ..job is no fun... ( if i have to sum up my past experiences it was like.. a half baked cake strutting out of a oven shouting on a yummy delicious blackforest tht the blackforest is black... (and here blackforest= me)(thk god!! i escaped now i've started living again...and the credit goes to...who else.. me!!!) so business,,, cool i have the ideas ..wat i need is cash..( dollar de yaan pound de de)

10. be alive.. and if i dont..get out alive.. atleast be a beautiful ghost and then travelling will be free.. so i can go to ice hotel, do bungee jumping from a peepal tree.. maybe even find a spanish bhoot... wow.. so in anycase i win..

me

Long back i asked a friend to define me, and she just said a single word "eccentric". I waited for the list to continue but that was the end. So maybe thats my description Eccentric. Later i even went thr the pain of a browsing thr a thick book called the "oxford dictionary" to understand myself better, Here's what the glass-rimmed, grim faced, stiff upperlip english guys said about me,

Eccentric: a person with unusual or odd personality.