Showing posts with label Nostalgia. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Nostalgia. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Nostalgia

Yesterday as I was driving from my Office, back home I was greeted with the verve of Ganesh Chaturthi celebrations which stand for Pune as I remember it. The Pandals located at fixed distances, with the magnificent Ganesh idols, the soft hymns, the occasional remixed songs, the lights, the festive spirit, all of it brought about some memories with it.
I first came to Pune in the same period, eight years back to join Engineering College, A painfully shy teenager who daily travelled 30kms to reach college. Pune was different back then. Six-seaters were still running, the roads were full of potholes; vada-paav was for 4 Rs, The numerous malls were not the part of the city skyline.  What remains same though is the spirit of Pune. Apart from the occasional core areas, I never felt left out. I was as much a part of the city as the city is of me.
The first day of college as I remember it was tense, I had joined late, so the groups were already formed. People knew each other and no one bothered to introduce each other. My being shy was not any help either. The next thing I remember vividly is the Ganesh festivities, with the roads jammed; I always worried about reaching home on time.  The extroverts planned a site-seeing throughout Pune and I struggled to reach home before sunset J
First Year of college soon rolled through, what I achieved in this first year was a group of five girl-friends who were fun. Some of them I lost touch with over time and some who are still the best of my friends. I lived on a stringent budget back then, so every day having snacks and juice (patties and sugarcane juice) near the college was indulgence. What significantly stands out is the innocence of the first year of college, the need to prove oneself, the sometimes bitchy sometimes sisterly attitude of teens, the stealing glances at your crush who somehow became a reason to attend college. I have enjoyed my best in the first year of college and still smile at the stupid jokes we cracked back then. I remember stifling laughs throughout the one hour lecture once, and that’s one of my happiest memories. Very soon the year was through and we were reshuffled to join our respective streams.
Second year of engineering passed with me always seated on the front desk oblivious to the rest of the folks behind me. For me no one existed beyond my desk. I vividly remember a very talkative, bubbly girl sitting beside me for a boring Maths session and getting bored more so by my silence. Later as we got closer, she confessed how much she cursed me for my silence.
The years passed through with all the ups and downs and very soon I was out of college. What changed the most in those 4 years was me.  More than the technical education, I value the education which changed me as a person. I still am introvert and take ages to open up. The friends that I made back then, some stayed, some drifted apart, rest are acquaintances I smile at when I run across them. But every one of them contributed to what I am today. As George Adams said:
“There is no such thing as a "self-made" man. We are made up of thousands of others. Everyone who has ever done a kind deed for us, or spoken one word of encouragement to us, has entered into the make-up of our character and of our thoughts, as well as our success.”
I  owe my mental makeup to many of such friends who unknowingly taught me many a things, be it laughing at stupid jokes, enjoying life, managing studies and fun or more deeper values like trust and friendship.  I always thought of myself as a person who has cloaked her shyness under arrogance and I occasionally wear my cloak inside out.
Growing up isn’t about age, it’s about the experiences which you learn from; I owe all my acquaintances the fact that they are the part of my experiences. Good or bad, it’s the experience that counts. Eight years back, as I wrestled in the crowd to catch a glimpse of the all famous Dagdusheth, I realized that the God of learning is not going to bless me based on my efforts to reach him, I am truly blessed because I have accepted and learnt and that’s what is expected out of me. So the silent prayer which I offered all thorough my four years of engineering, almost subconsciously as I drove past the Paud bridge and the Ganesh temple there, suffices for me. Here’s that prayer: “meri  galtiyaan maaf karna aur mujhe  sadhbuddhi dena” That’s all I can ask for. For rest everything, I have the banks and credit card J
Bottomline: This is the first time in years that I am not busy enough, first time in years that I have enjoyed the Ganesh festivities, first time in years when I have actually slowed down my two-wheeler to have a look at the Pandal and first time in years that the deafening music, be it hymns or remixed songs have not irritated me.  So maybe this is the first time that I feel at peace with myself. All thanks to the God of learning.

Saturday, May 31, 2008

My Black Pencil & Tattoo Mania

There are two kinds of people in this world..(take this line as research not plagiarism). The BIG PLANNERS & the not so big IMPULSIVE ones, and i belong to the later category.. point stated.
But this story is not about the categorisation of people. Its about "my black pencil" and all the memoirs attached to it.
So, as mentioned i consider myself very impulsive(So do bank credit card folks..I've references u see). In addition to being that I also have the tendency to get attached to certain petty things. Things which seem so important to me then, but when they come in my reach i dont care.
one such thing was my black pencil. A matt-finish black lead pencil which was quite heavy.( I hate to call it a thing). She came in my life in my first yr of engineering as a gift from someone. And with her i always felt secure. She helped me clear my "engineering graphics" back then. As i progressed furthur, just having it in my hand made me study better. (Before any1 starts calling the asylum). one day destiny struck. I LOST IT.
I was so heartbroken. And till date I miss her. I like to believe some1 stole it. (P.S. please return it, if u reading).
That was episode 1, just a tribute to things i lost. Chapter 2 is about the things I've done on impulse, there are many. some did lead to not-so-good consequences. But i still stand by each and everyone of my decisons. So heres the latest I've done on impulse.
1.I dont know whats the big deal about getting a tattoo. But all the people I've spoken to, make a typical face.. how do i describe it... the kind of face madhubala will make if she comes to know mallika is considered sexy in today's world. well, doesnt make any sense. In short, people disapprove, but i fail to understand why.(i'd love to have a debate on this 1)I failed to mention this fact in my list of "things I wanna do b4 i turn 30" but tattoo was to be on the list. good it made this 1. Till now i think if some1 is sure enough tht he/she wants it..go get it.. Finally its your desison. maybe in the long run it'll effect. But point is feed your impulse. Next time i get the force.. i may change my momentum to get 2 more done. Its all about standing out.. and if u have it in u.. etre seul..
So, thats the whole story, I have no idea if it makes sense or not. But when i think of tattoo i remember my black pencil. because things didnt change after i lost her. (i miss her) .I did clear my education, things wont have changed if i had not made the latest impulsive action, but i dont wanna miss having a tattoo at 70. another senseless analogy. But life wud be boring if we try put sense in everything.